After ten and a half years of marriage my world was rocked when my husband told me he had an affair and he wasn’t sorry and didn’t want to reconcile our marriage. I find myself in an awkwardly “anti-public opinion” position of not hating him, or her. I had a life that wasn’t perfect, but it was perfectly mine and while we may not have been the best married, and I wonder if there is hope that we I might just make it out as friends.
130 days after he told me about his affair, my world was rocked again, when his body was found, tragically ended- allegedly self-inflicted. So I am saying goodbye to him yet again.
My faith in Jesus Christ and my close friends who have rallied around me remind me that I am strong enough to make it through. The concern I have is the stops that my mind and heart will want to make along the way. There is much to pray, much to say and much to know.
Search me, O God, and know my heart;
try me, and know my thoughts.
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